I dreamt I was working and ran into my buddy C. We started talking about food and he was like omg you have to meet this chick that works here. We go meet her and she is a hot blonde and we hit it off right away. But the chick was a bad ass soup maker. And she made this pork soup and to make it taste right u had to be able to kill the pig in under 24! seconds. Lol so she killed pigs by choking them out with her legs Hahahaha. So any way after that I was walking thru this building and a fighter plane crashed outside. We all seen it crash but it wasn’t sad or shocking it made everyone start dancing and singing. Then I went and had lunch with that chick that kills pigs and we made out a bit. Then later on it was dark and I went outdoor skating on a golf course that had ice trails lol that was my dream.

Whenever I see physical intimacy in a dream, even if it’s kissing or just making out, it is always a signal to me that the dreamer is getting a message from the dream about intimacy. I write more about this in 1008 Dreams & Solutions but here I can just say that sex in dreams, even kissing, is a SYMBOL for intimacy and is not meant to be taken literally.

Because I have worked with this dreamer for many years, I know him well and I know he is a trustworthy and inspiring guy who would never just start making out with some chick he just meets. I also know that the metaphor for being able to skate even in places you wouldn’t expect to see skating, like on a golf course, is a good metaphor for him. It means he can make the best of a challenging situation, mostly because of his optimism & his sense of humour, along with a certain adventurous and playful spirit. This also shows up as a symbol of being able to dance & sing even after a plane crash.

So what is the message about intimacy that this dream is trying to show him? What is the issue? And what is the solution which would allow for the plane to keep flying instead of crashing?

The dream points to a cultural issue about the way men see women. So that’s what I wanted to write about here. When men learn how to be more intimate with women in a way which is not all about kissing and making out then all relationships will get better and better.

The chick in this dream is bad ass. She makes great soup and she’s got a near-miraculous super-human way of creating just the right taste and flavour which involves doing something which involves physical strength, stamina, flexibility, accuracy, courage and a certain toughness. To kill a pig in less than 24 seconds with just the strength of leg power is quite a feat! This girl is amazing!

The right thing for the dreamer to do would be to just enjoy the soup. Or if he wants to learn more he could ask to learn how to make the soup with her. Then he could be out there being bad ass too, killing pigs with his leg powers. Afterall, it would be somewhat easier for him likely, given to men’s natural hunter instinct.

But no, instead of joining her in miraculous soup making he talks with her at lunch and gets to kissing her and making out with her.

That’s why everything went dark afterwards.

That’s why ice showed up in a recreational area like a golf course which is supposed to be enjoyed in warm weather.

He had the opportunity to learn to make bad ass soup with an amazingly beautiful, strong and smart woman and yet all he could think about was getting in her pants.

Now this was just a dream and like I said, in real life, this dreamer is not the kind of guy who would just jump to kissing some stranger. This is not about a real life affair. This is about a metaphor. The metaphor is there to show blocks to deep intimacy.

The real negative parts of the dream are really negative. Plane crashes in a dream are about devastation and loss of a positive future. Being in the dark and cold is about being or feeling isolated and alone. These are not the kind of states anyone wants to spend much time in.

In our culture, there is a common tendency for people to think that going for sex is a good way to eliminate feelings of lonliness or loss but in reality, the key to change and growth is about learning to feel strong within oneself no matter what is going on in the outside world. When there is a certain gentleness and peacefulness internally then all relationships are easier and really cool things can come out of it. The symbol of this is the really great soup that this cool chick makes.

So what can the dreamer do to solve this issue?

He can start by asking himself where in his life today does he have the chance to go for something really positive with someone and where or how is he holding himself back?

It would be good to explore the metaphor of soup. He can ask himself what does it mean to him?

He can ask himself – in what ways am I like that bad ass soup-making chick and what could I do to bring some of that adventurous and creative spirit into my life today?

In the end, what his dream is calling him to do is to be more like the soup woman – to have her agility and creativity. But he can’t do that so long as he is going along in this pattern which leads to plane crashes, and dark cold golf courses.

In order to have these qualities he will have to look at some of his issues around what is stopping him from feeling peaceful and when he can be more at ease, which might involve releasing some old fears, then he will find more and more opportunities to do some really cool things in his life which will be very nourishing and helpful to many others.