Tag Archives: Parenting

My Dream About the Whale Show

This dream is from back in 2011ish but the interpretation is still so meaningful even today!

My daughter and I were at an amusement park and were going down to see the whale show. The bleachers were set up beside the ocean. We go down there and there are 3 orca whales that are interacting with the people in the front row. They are playful and beautiful. So magestic. Grace comes down and is in a great mood then she just jumps right into the water. I’m not concerned at first. I know she can swim. But then instead of coming up to me she swims farther into where the whales are swimming and even past them. A lifeguard jumps out to get her. The whole audience is hushed as they wait. The lifeguard gets her and brings her back. She had swam very deep and very far away. Never coming up for air but not appearing to struggle. I hold her and hug her and say ‘Oh my girl. I love you so much. You scared me.” She doesn’t understand what the big deal was. I don’t know what to tell her.

(In the time when the lifeguard is swimming out to her and the audience is hushed I am feeling ashamed that she just jumped like that and I didn’t protect her. I feel that the audience is judging me and that it appears she doesn’t respect me.)

Thank you Richard.

Dear Rachel,

It is nice to hear from you.    In the first dream you can think of yourself as your daughter, while in the second dream you can think of your daughter being you and it being her.

In the first dream [which appears in the e-book but not here in this short blog post] you (as your daughter’s age) want to speak, but you as the mother want to her stop in a violent way.   So you can say that you are violent with yourself from speaking out more probably in a positive way about the big dreams you have and the things you want to do.    The second dream is clearer about it.   You have 3 big dreams(goals in your life) which are symbolized by the 3 Orcas and at first you can just dive into to achieve them, but then you get fearful of going too deep and too far and begin to panic so you send out the rescue to get yourself back to where you are right now.

The way you are raising your daughter and leading your life is allowing her and you to have big dreams and to go for them but you are fearful of going too deep and too far so then you do everything you can to stop them even being violent as in the first dream.    The fear began at the current age your daughter is (age 6ish) and that is why you are violent to shut it down because you are so fearful that something bad is going to happen to her because something bad happened to you at that age.

So you can say that you are doing a wonderful job raising your daughter and that is leading her and you to be able to have big dreams and aspirations,  but there is a fear that something bad is going to happen that keeps you from going after the bigger things and thus encouraging her to bigger things.
As soon as you address the fear you can be thinking much larger about your life.

Sweet dreams

Richard

Dreamwork in Parenting: Dealing With a Dented Car on the Day of a Celebration

03 June 2017

20170508_130037On 30 May 2017 I dreamed of being at a celebration, like summer fireworks, and when I returned I found someone had dented my car on the passenger side. I awoke on that Thursday morning thinking about the metaphor of a car, the feeling of celebration, and the experience of getting a dent. The car is still drivable but it will take time, money & coordination to get things back to normal.

That day, my daughter had a rough day. Things at school the day before didn’t go the way she wanted and so when she woke up she was still feeling out of sorts. That night she was acting out with yelling, swearing, and she even threw things at me. A pillow. A stuffed animal. I don’t think she really wanted to hurt me but she just really wanted to get control of the situation.

At one point I held her hands down and pushed my shoulders against her and I calmly said, “What you are doing is not okay. You’ve got to stop now.” For that moment she stopped but then she started swearing and saying negative things again. I said a few prayers and left the room.

The feeling I had at the end of the night was exactly like the feeling of a dented car.

On my side of things, I had a great day. I was even feeling a bit celebratory because things were going well in several areas that day. When she started showing up with her bad behaviour it just really dampened things and instead of feeling light and cheery like a celebration, I felt like I was dealing with a dented car which was to have to think and figure how and when and where to get the work done to get it fixed etc.

It was like her negative actions and words took me out of my positive feelings in my heart and forced me into thinking with my head.

We live in a culture and a world which is really head-based and so few people even consider anymore the power of the heart, the strength of feelings.

What is different about what I did than what most people would do is that I detached myself from her negative words and actions and then with a lot of LOVE just laughed my way through the ordeal.

I just love my daughter and cherish her so deeply. When she is in pain I also feel in pain but when she is happy I also feel happy!

But I’ve got to admit. The next day, Friday morning, June 02, 2017 I was still feeling raw and vulnerable from the night before.

No one should ever feel unsafe in their home and it is not right that a child should behave in a way which makes anyone feel unsafe. I know this is serious. I’m not going to lie. I know that I need to learn new things about parenting and apply a new strategy.

I’ve been doing a few things for the past 8 years which have really helped a lot but I didn’t write about them before.

So I’m going to keep writing about them now because I think where she and I are headed will give us a lot to celebrate. It will just take time, patience and Love to get where we are going.

Three Orcas & Interpretation

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Dear Richard,

How are you? I trust you are enjoying the holiday season.

I have been receiving a dream that keeps repeating itself and growing in intensity. Although I have been trying to interpret it myself I think there is something I am missing and the dream I had last night prompted me to write to you.

The repetative dream I keep having is about me and my daughter. In each dream she is talking so much and I become very angry with her. In each dream I am violent to her to get her to stop. I hit her, slap her, or put my hand over her mouth sort of suffocating her, or even put my hand in her mouth. She always resists. Never stops and it makes me more and more angry. The dreams just end with me doing these horrible things.

So this is not at all the way that I parent, making it hard to even share that I am having these dreams. However, I have learned so much from your interpretations and I do believe that the dreams are teaching me how to be more peaceful. These dreams remind me of how I felt when I was Grace’s age.

Some adults “smothered” (metaphorically and sometimes literally)  the way I am smothering her in the dream. I suspect I still have pain here and some forgiveness is needed.

But why in the dream is it me being violent to my daughter instead of me as a child? It has been my life’s passion to be a loving and nurturing parent, to have a peaceful and spirit-filled home. But is the dream telling me if I don’t change some things the consequence is that I will have a negative impact on my daughter the same way adults had on me?

Well, I am sure my emotions around this topic prevent me from gaining the insight. I’ll pray for detachment and in the meantime await your response.

Last night, I prayed before bed and reflected on my current waking life situation with Grace. I prayed for guidance about how to understand what the violent dreams are telling me.

Then I dreamed this:

Grace and I were at an amusement park and were going down to see the whale show. The bleachers were set up beside the ocean. We go down there and there are 3 orca whales that are interacting with the people in the front row. They are playful and beautiful. So magestic. Grace comes down and is in a great mood then she just jumps right into the water. I’m not concerned at first. I know she can swim. But then instead of coming up to me she swims farther into where the whales are swimming and even past them. A lifeguard jumps out to get her. The whole audience is hushed as they wait. The lifeguard gets her and brings her back. She had swam very deep and very far away. Never coming up for air but not appearing to struggle. I hold her and hug her and say ‘Oh my girl. I love you so much. You scared me.” She doesn’t understand what the big deal was. I don’t know what to tell her.

(In the time when the lifeguard is swimming out to her and the audience is hushed I am feeling ashamed that she just jumped like that and I didn’t protect her. I feel that the audience is judging me and that it appears she doesn’t respect me.)

Thank you Richard.

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Dear Rachel,
It is nice to hear from you.    In the first dream you can think of yourself as your daughter, while in the second dream you can think of your daughter being you and it being her.

In the first dream you (as your daughter’s age) want to speak, but you as the mother want to her stop in a violent way.   So you can say that you are violent with yourself from speaking out more probably in a positive way about the big dreams you have and the things you want to do.    The second dream is clearer about it.   You have 3 big dreams (goals in your life) which are symbolized by the 3 Orcas and at first you can just dive into to achieve them, but then you get fearful of going too deep and too far and begin to panic so you send out the rescue to get yourself back to where you are right now.

The way you are raising your daughter and leading your life is allowing her and you to have big dreams and to go for them but you are fearful of going too deep and too far so then you do everything you can to stop them even being violent as in the first dream.    The fear began at the current age your daughter is and that is why you are violent to shut it down because you are so fearful that something bad is going to happen to her because something bad happened to you at that age.

So you can say that you are doing a wonderful job raising your daughter and that is leading her and you to be able to have big dreams and aspirations,  but there is a fear that something bad is going to happen that keeps you from going after the bigger things and thus encouraging her to bigger things.

As soon as you address the fear you can be thinking much larger about your life.

Sweet dreams

Richard

Dear Richard,

Okay – thank you so much! It is always nice to hear from you too 🙂 I thought you’d enjoy reading these 🙂

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REFLECTIONS ON RICHARD’S INTERPRETATION

The Three Orcas –

1) STABLE AND PEACEFUL HOME – I am so grateful to have been living in a stable and peaceful home for years now. My personal relationship with myself and others is comfortable and peaceful now.

2) AUTHOR AND SPEAKER – I am so grateful to have something meaningful to write about around the topic of transformation from Poverty To Prosperity and how it relates to dreamwork, change work, and fitness.

3) DAILY SPIRITUAL PRACTICE – I am so grateful to experience  a daily spiritual practice which gives me inspiration, guidance and calm even in some of the most challenging life storms.

Please God, let me eliminate the fear that is preventing me from going deeper into these dreams.