17 August 2017
I’m going to write this to give you an idea of the way I work with a nightmare in very specific detail.
The dream scenario was that I was in my room and sensed something was wrong in my daughter’s room. When I went into her room I found a man had invaded our house & was standing over her with a shotgun pointed to her face. I froze.
So to work through this dream first I have to understand the threat of the man & the gun.
Since it is a man unknown to me then this means it is a cultural issue and it not showing up in one specific man who I know but that all men have this potential threatening part to them. That’s pretty easy to understand since we live in a culture which is still male-dominated and incredibly debilitating to and for women.
I freeze in the dream and that means that the solution will be about my learning to move, spiritually and literally.
So how do I get out of the mental habit of freezing when I am threatened? How do I learn to keep moving even when things are a bit scary?
That’s where the WORK part of dreamwork comes in.
First I worked through the issue in a session with Richard Hastings from Dreams For Peace. He gave me some homework to do and now whenever I feel myself getting stuck I just do the homework.
Here is an example:
I can ask myself:
- What is the biggest challenge I am facing today? or What is the biggest challenge facing my daughter today?
- How does it make me freeze?
- When do I remember this type of challenge first showing up (usually in childhood or teen years)?
- What did I do in the past to deal with this challenge? What can I do differently now?
In this case, the fear I have is that someone will hurt me or my daughter. This is a natural fear any mother has. My own personal fear is heightened because I face many financial obstacles which leave us a bit more vunerable than if we had a bit more money at our disposal.
So I can think about who in my daughter’s life may hurt her and how and then I can think of what I can do differently so that this can be prevented.
The solution may bring up my own fears and so I need to work through those before or at the same time as preventing her from getting hurt.
As I resolve my own fears I can then easily move forward to ensure she is protected and safe.
Resolving my fears involves a visualization exercise.
I can recall someone who hurt me in the past and I can think about how I may fear they may hurt me or her again.
Then I can just turn down the volume on their negative voice and even erase the image of them in my mind as though they are disappearing. And then the fear is not so strong.
When they are gone out of my mind I can move forward exactly as I want and need feeling fearless and brave.
This is one of the types of exercises I do to work through a fear which showed up in a dream and to learn a new skill which increases my own confidence & courage.
When I move forward in this positive way many good opportunities open up for me and my daughter!