Category Archives: Creating a New Self

Dreams From the Box: Having an Adventurous Spirit on the Quest for New Gems of Character

When I listen to dreams from inmates, the first thing I do is remove judgement. It’s not my role to judge or criticize, just to listen and support. Recently, an inmate who calls himself “Money” shared a dream with me and he said he thinks it’s about how he is going deeper into himself and discovering the good things that are there which he never saw before. I got really excited when he shared the dream because it is such an awesome metaphor for the stages we go thru during transformation as we are searching for the positives.
Here is the dream:
I’m a desert, in Egypt, wearing clothes I would never wear, like khaki hiking shorts and a white polo shirt. I go into the pyramid and realize I am the guide, others are waiting for him to tell him what to do and where to go. I’ve been told not to push on the bricks but then I push on a brick anyway and then suddenly trap doors start opening and everyone falls down a hole one by one. They are each going down their own tunnels and falling and I can hear them screaming and yelling and then it stops and I figure they died. But then I keep falling down my tunnel and I land in a treasure-filled room and there’s all these gems and gold and stuff. It’s amazing and I realize it’s all for me and then in the far back part I see a mummy with a really special necklace. It’s gold and diamonds and really valuable so I get up as close as I can and I use a long stick to try to pull the necklace off. And then I woke up. What do you think it means?
This is such a perfect dream for the way transformation works because the energy used when going for change is a lot like being on an adventurous quest in an unknown territory. When we dig deep & have a lot of enthusiasm for the process then we can find “gems” of virtues within us – Courage, Confidence, Assertiveness & Patience – which we can then use in many life experiences.

A dream & interpretation about hospital

Over the past few years I’ve listened to and read hundreds of dreams and offered interpretations with solutions for turning negatives into positives and creating a new life, a new self.  Recently, someone who has been sending me dreams for more than a year agreed to let me share them here so the message can be shared with others. 
Others continue to send dreams for me to post here too or emailing me personally at rperrydreamwork@gmail.com. I welcome and invite people to post dreams here or email me and I will reply.
Hi Rachel,
So I dreamt I was in a hospital. Not sure if I worked there or was a patient but I lived there. Most likely a patient then but idk for what. Of course there was a girl we were friends and hung out all the time. She had a b4 that didn’t like me as he thought we were cheating but nothing happened. The girl gave me a kitten as a gift. Also there was a little girl in the dream that hung out with us too. Not sure who she was but later in the dream we found she had bed bugs. Not sure why else to say it was a long dream with a lot of detail but it’s fuzzy now. Like the girl that was a friend was my age her bf was 27 she didn’t like him much the girl and I liked each other like sexually but never did any thing. The little girls mom worked in the hospital. The girl that was my friend we would hang out and watch a tv show all the time. I think that’s it
I’m assuming this dream follows the same theme as all the others. Does being in a hospital mean healing? Or like fixing some thing? Like I’m still on the right track? It’s getting annoying there is always a girl and the same plot.
~ Anonymous
****
HomeBusinesSuccess!Hi Anonymous
What a great dream! Thanks for sharing it with me.
To dream of the same plot repeatedly, or to have a re-occuring dream, means there is an issue in your life (within yourself) which you are working with. This is the Science of the Dreamwork process: when you work with an issue by facing the difficult emotions over and over again then skills and capacities grow within you and as a result life gets better and better and better.
A girl showing up in  your dreams over and over, but she is not someone you know in real life, means that she is a metaphor for a cultural “girl” – it means the issue you have with her can show up in real life with any girl, any female, any woman.
When you get this, it will be as awesome as receiving a kitten, watching TV shows with friends and living or working in a hospital helping others.
The only way to deal with our re-occuring issues is to do the work daily.
It’s really not that easy because the mind has a whole storehouse full of memories of trying to go for things in life and not getting them. It’s okay to remember those things which were painful in our lives in the past because when we remember them we can process the negative emotion around the situation and then let it go.

Letting go is the key but most people in the world do not want to let go of those feelings.

It doesn’t really make a lot of sense but the thinking seems to be something like, “if I admit I have these feelings I might get hurt again, so I’ll deny I have them and then everything will be okay.” Anger, Fear or Devastation come in to try to protect the self from experiencing more pain.
But it never works. Negative feelings are our friends because they are great teachers. We learn so much from them. Acknowledging we have them is the key to transforming them. Pretending they aren’t there leads to sickness. This is why our culture is so dependent on pain killers and anti-depressants, not to mention legalized drugs like alcohol and marijuanna.
Not looking at the negatives in life makes us sick, facing them and transcending them heals & restores us.
When we work through these we can really help a lot of people in the world.
So let’s look at the dream. There are a lot of great metaphors here.
We might talk about them in more detail next time we meet.
**********************************************************

In a dream like this, with a mix of negatives and positives it’s good to start out noticing the positives.

The setting is a hospital so that means you are in a process of healing. That is positive.
You had a friend in the hospital that is also positive.
Your friend gave you a kitten. What quality does a kitten have? A cat has the quality of independence. So a kitten in a dream means this quality is starting to develop in you now but it is at the beginning stages. That’s positive.
In the dream you liked each other sexually but didn’t do anything. Liking someone sexually in a dream is a metaphor for intimacy. For that reason, you could say it’s good to have sex in dreams with women you are attracted to because it is a symbol of integrating with a quality they have which you can also have. The laws of dreams are different than the laws of real life.
You can think of it this way. In dreams we travel to a place even though we don’t use our feet or any vehicle to get there; In dreams we are free from time. In dreams, we can fly and sour and bounce and we are free from gravity. In dreams, if we just think a thing to be there, it can be there. This is the way dreams work. They are free from time and space and many of the other laws which govern the earth.

In real life, to have sexual feelings for someone else’s girl friend is not appropriate.

Even more so to act on them.

This fundamental rule about chastity and loyalty helps to keep marriages together.
Marriages are important because they are the foundation of a family. Family is important because that is the loving environment were children are raised and nurtured. Children are important because they grow and become the adult human beings who advance civilization forward into the bright future for humanity. In this way, we could say that the peace of the world rests on the foundation of strong, loving marriages. It rests on strong, nurturing families.
The problem with our culture, of course, is that marriage is sometimes seen as more of a burden than a foundation for Peace.
I’m going to say something a bit radical here and you can disagree with me wildly if you like.
The biggest challenge that shows up in this dream is when you have sexual feelings for  your friend in the dream and you don’t act on them.
Because it is a dream, to have those feelings and act on them is good. Really good.
Even in real life, if you meet someone who is not married, even if they have a girl friend or boy friend, in a way they are still “spiritually single” and that is because they have not entered into the very special institution of marriage. Our culture would wild disagree but our culture is often wrong about so many things thats how we got into this mess in the first place.
Some people used to say “I don’t want to get married because it is just a piece of paper.” In a way they are right but in a way they are not right. I’ll tell you why.
The point of marriage is to announce to one another and to the public that the two of you vow to be together for life. You vow to help one another become better people, for life, and some believe even eternity. This is a very profound promise.

In a true marriage, the bond goes deeper than the physical intimacy. The two beings become united emotionally and mentally too. They become as one soul, as one being.

 

The union transcends space and time in that way. There is a majesty and a beauty to marriage for this reason. It is very, very different than individuals who agree to live together and have sex regularly, with or without conceiving children. This is not marriage. It may not even be more than a nice room-mate agreement which meets a lot of physical needs but does nothing for emotional, mental and spiritual needs or development of true capacities.
So we can say in your dream, the biggest challenge you have is wanting to have sex with your friend and not going for it. In the dream it would have been better if you did. Then the little girl would not have gotten bed bugs. Her boyfriend would not have gotten jealous or angry and instead of watching TV all the time the two of you could create a new life for one another.
Now please allow me to be clear about something.
In real life it is NOT OKAY to have sex with friends who have boyfriends. In real day-to-day life, sexual acts create babies who are then born into relationships with people who may or may not be committed to one another. It’s all over our culture now but it won’t always be this way. And what I’m writing might be perceived as radical but it’s not meant to be that way.
What I’m trying to say is that the experience of a child raised in the environment of a loving marriage is different than a child raised in the environment of a loving boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. It’s just different, because marriage actually has a spiritual reality and is actually like a fortress for well-being. 
Whereas a boy-friend/girl-friend relationship is just…more superficial.
Alright, so in the dream you didn’t have sex with your friend, meaning you were not emotionally and mentally intimate or connected with her and that’s too bad, so what happened was the girl got bed bugs, the boyfriend got jealous and you watched TV when you hung out.
How to turn this around?
The key is the kitten.
The kitten is a symbol for independence. Like being an independent thinker.
Since you were a teenager in the dream (if I guess that this is the same at the other dreams with the same theme) then this is about what happened when you were a teenager which stopped you from thinking for yourself independently.

Since there was a little girl in the dream who got bedbugs you can think of her as symbolizing things which happened to you or to your friend-girl at that age. 

Bugs are little invisible things which reproduce quickly. In real life, the little things which reproduce quickly are negative comments people make to others behind the back of someone. Negative criticism & fault-finding spreads like bugs and can destroy an environment and make it very difficult to find rest. Bugs in a bed can be about finding it difficult to find rest which is the main purpose for a bed.
In a dream with bugs you can ask yourself: What is bugging me about a little girl’s childhood?
The older jealous boyfriend is probably the reason you didn’t have sex with the girl in your dream. The fear would be that he might attack and do anything to try to get his girl friend back. Our culture teaches men it’s okay to sort of act as if they own their girl-friends. This is such a huge unconscious cultural issue it’s like an invisible insidious pandemic sweeping the nation.
I’m going to write something here and it might be hard to get at first but in time it will be clearer.
Since you are in a hospital, and the girl’s mom works there, and your friend & you get along well & the bed bugs were found so now they can be exterminated then that means there is no more room for the jealous, angry, older boyfriend who just wants to dominate and control things.
In the dream, you think of him but he does not show up. He doesn’t attack. There are no issues there.
So here is the lesson for you with the dream: the painful issues you had around intimacy are based on a memory (from childhood & high school) and because you are dealing so well with it and working through it now with such regularity the pattern is changing and is becoming a non-issue now. 
That is the power of uncovering the secret messages of our unconscious feelings which show up as metaphors in dreams. When we make them conscious, acknowledge them, and detach from them we can heal from any painful event from the past. When we heal from painful events from the past we are free to live with a lot of Joy in the present.
What is the message of the dream then?
You could ask yourself: What can I do today to start to be more like the kitten and think independently?
Or: where in my life am I trying to go for intimacy in relationships and the fear of an angry boyfriend is stopping me from going forward. (Remember: this might not be literal…”angry boyfriend” could also be a symbol for “angry boss” or “angry father”…any seemingly more powerful male figure who thinks he has control over you and your life.
Ask yourself these questions and see what shows up.
 **************************************************************

Getting a Negative Person out of my house

GETTING A NEGATIVE PERSON OUT OF MY HOUSE

I dreamed that I was in my new house.

some man I know to be negative comes over
it seems we are going to get married
he goes into the other room
i follow him and then get really confused
I go back into the first room and speak to someone
in talking to her I recall things about what just happened in the other room.
i realize he had invited others over and sets up a voodoo-thing
invites me into the room
at first i think it is interesting because the leader
cuts the cord between a husband and wife who
were divorcing and the man was set free to
live his life.so i thought it was good.
but then the people surround me
someone i don’t know is walking around me with
eyes like hypnotized speaking non-sense words
and putting face close to mine
then R. holds my left arm down and whispers
repeatedly in my ear “killing…killing…killing…killing” seemingly 50 times
he said “chop chop chop chop” like he would chop me up, or like I would be
forced to chop someone else up.
i’m trying to block out him and the other person at the same time.
when i talk to the woman about this she is sitting on a chair
comfortably, bright window and tall plants beside her,
she is so comfortable and she seems to know what to do about the situation.
i am a bit afraid because i think he trained me to be a killer or that he was going to kill me.
I realize he now knows where i live and he lives across the street down a few blocks.
the woman has lots of ideas for how to regain safety. and she goes about the house
showing me things. Like for example, we vaccuum up some item he left behind
and then throw out the vaccuum. and while doing this i listen to her words
carefully and learn a way of speaking which protects and comforts me.
she trains me to speak in an encouraging way.
at one point, i sit down at a table with someone who in real life i wanted to marry in high school and now just find him an interesting character. i open up a window beside the table. cool air blows in and he wraps himself up and shivers and wines a bit like a baby. i like the fresh air and don’t want to close the window so i hope he will warm up but he stays chilly so eventually i close it for him.
i went back to preparing the house to keep it safe from invaders. she seemed to believe it could be done and had such confidence about her that i believed it could be done too.
it seemed at one point he came back to the window and because of what we had set up he could not get in.
he went away. he could never come back.

Interesting Details About Dreamwork For Prisoners

Join the growing list of caring subscribers to this list!

The Mission of Healing With Dreamwork is to take what people think of as dream interpretation to a deeper level of transformation 

Info about Dreamwork With Prisoners is also available online at this link.

We’re CAN $6150 in the red for the year. 
Please support this important work and make a donation.

Dear friends,

It brings me joy to share details of the new dreamwork initiative launched in jails across Ontario. This email aims to answer some questions, shed some light on the scope of the project, and invite people to get involved in anyway they wish.


Throughout 2014 – 2018, I began exploring dream metaphors of jails, cops, detectives and solving crimes. I was also living in a city formally known as “The Murder Capital of Canada” and while there was researching and writing to expose the components within environments which breed criminal behaviour, especially crimes against children and women. 

In 2018, I started hearing dreams from inmates at Maplehurst Correctional Complex and giving interpretations. The idea with the way I do dreamwork is to take what people usually think of as dream interpretation to a deeper level with a focus on transformation. In the past year, more than 22 inmates have shared their dreams and together we walked through some of the biggest issues from the dream, usually related to strong negative emotions such as fear, anger or disappointment. This innovative approach seeks to identify skills, capacities and strengths in the dreamer so that he can use these strengths to solve the complex challenges facing him in daily life. 

One Saturday in January seven people called; many of them called two or three times so I had several 40-60 minute sessions. Each of the inmates either had a new dream to share or wanted to continue talking about the issues brought up from dreams they shared earlier in the week. Issues range from working through childhood trauma & sexual abuse, issues with addiction, struggling with anger, post-holiday disappointment and working with strong feelings of guilt or remorse for the actions associated with their charges. Many of them either have court coming up or were just returning from court and were feeling discouraged with the lengthy trial process.

In addition to the therapy work, I also support them with legal matters occasionally. I’ve mediated discussions with lawyers and advocated during a couple medical emergencies. In December, I acted as a media liaison for a highly publicized case involving criminal charges pressed against a cop who shot an inmate. The inmate has recurring nightmares about the shooting and the dreams reveal tremendous strength and capacity. Often times, inmates ask me to send texts or phone calls to their family members, their children, their spouses. I like to think that these connections help to strengthen relationships during the incarceration of their loved one and helps ease the strain of the cold institutional setting just a wee bit. It’s a bit like a ray of sunshine after a storm.

How To Break Free From the Mother of All Fears

Dec. 04, 2018

IMG_1280Old Pattern

  1. Get an idea
  2. Fear of it not working out comes up (fear of abandonment/Mother of all Fears)
  3. Give into the fear & give up on the goal
  4. Go for the goal but so unorganized can’t succeed.
  5. Back to bed with illness

 

New Pattern 

  1. Get an idea
  2. See the obstacles
  3. Feel foggy minded, unfocused
  4. Move slowly thru the fog in meditation
  5. Envision the solution, getting to the other side
  6. Feel Enthusiastic & Empowered with Determination to get there
  7. Take an immediate step towards it’s accomplishment as though it’s already done.

 

The animal which shows up in dreams when working thru this pattern, when developing Enthusiasm & Empowerment is the horse.

40932412_10160947345250595_686116915252297728_n