some man I know to be negative comes over

it seems we are going to get married

he goes into the other room

i follow him and then get really confused

I go back into the first room and speak to someone

in talking to her I recall things about what just happened in the other room.

i realize he had invited others over and sets up a voodoo-thing

invites me into the room

at first i think it is interesting because the leader

cuts the cord between a husband and wife who

were divorcing and the man was set free to

live his life.so i thought it was good.

but then the people surround me

someone i don’t know is walking around me with

eyes like hypnotized speaking non-sense words

and putting face close to mine

then R. holds my left arm down and whispers

repeatedly in my ear “killing…killing…killing…killing” seemingly 50 times

he said “chop chop chop chop” like he would chop me up, or like I would be

forced to chop someone else up.

i’m trying to block out him and the other person at the same time.

when i talk to the woman about this she is sitting on a chair

comfortably, bright window and tall plants beside her,

she is so comfortable and she seems to know what to do about the situation.

i am a bit afraid because i think he trained me to be a killer or that he was going to kill me.

I realize he now knows where i live and he lives across the street down a few blocks.

the woman has lots of ideas for how to regain safety. and she goes about the house

showing me things. Like for example, we vaccuum up some item he left behind

and then throw out the vaccuum. and while doing this i listen to her words

carefully and learn a way of speaking which protects and comforts me.

she trains me to speak in an encouraging way.

at one point, i sit down at a table with someone who in real life i wanted to marry in high school and now just find him an interesting character. i open up a window beside the table. cool air blows in and he wraps himself up and shivers and wines a bit like a baby. i like the fresh air and don’t want to close the window so i hope he will warm up but he stays chilly so eventually i close it for him.

i went back to preparing the house to keep it safe from invaders. she seemed to believe it could be done and had such confidence about her that i believed it could be done too.

it seemed at one point he came back to the window and because of what we had set up he could not get in.

he went away. he could never come back.